Debra Farish's blog

Stories

Not sure who coined the phrase about "my stories are on," but I remember hearing this whenever shows like "Days of Our Lives" started.  It wasn't fashionable to call them "soap operas" then. I admit what draws me to them is I love knowing the back story of a good family tale.  

What has been the fun part now is how my family history is coming to life through a new generation (thanks to my niece and nephew).   

For example, take the shenanigans of my four-year-old niece.  The story began long before her birth. In fact, it goes back two generations when family lore tells how my mother would love to go visiting neighbors as a preschooler without Grammie aware of it.  The moment she could make a break for it, Mom would run across the street to sit on someone's porch waiting for their return. 

Recently, my sister started the conversation with, "guess what YOUR niece did?"  This next generation opened the front door and walked down the street to neighbor's house telling her that "Mommie said it was all right to be here to play."

Imagine my sister's surprise to receive a text from her neighbor lettting her know that her wee one was at the end of the street in a blink of an eye.  If history is repeating itself, then my sister may have to try Grammie's solution of a harness attached to the clothes line to wrangle the social butterfly.  

Another great story about my Mom stems from when she was about the same age.  My grandparents were entertaining a work colleague of Pop pop's for dinner.  The guest went to sit down in the living room only to discover that my Mom had wet herself while sitting in the very chair just moments before he sat.     

The last story about my Mom that I will tell was how she worked her way forward to see a store window display in downtown Baltimore in the mid 1940's.  After the "show' ended, the crowd dispersed, and my Mother wasn't there.  Somehow Grammie found her standing in the middle of the street, safely holding a police officer's hand.

Remembering these stories gives me a different vantage point of my Mom.  Her life ended with sickness and complications of her Multiple Schlerosis.  But she wasn't crippled her whole life; in fact, she was energetic and charming, just like Mackenna is.  

Psalm 78:2-4 - New Living Translation

 for I will speak to you in a parable.
   I will teach you hidden lessons from our past—
  stories we have heard and known,
      stories our ancestors handed down to us.
 We will not hide these truths from our children;
      we will tell the next generation
   about the glorious deeds of the Lord,
      about his power and his mighty wonders.

 

 

 

 

Reminiscing

Can't help it but that song from the Little River Band keeps playing in my head.

Now as the years roll on
each time we hear our favorite song
the memories come along
Older times we're missing
spending the hours reminiscing

Last night was a great opportunity to see old friends at a Girls Night Live concert hosted at my church. The smattering of faces and hello waves in a sea of 3,000 last night was nice. It's true the memories do come flooding back.

Remembering the parties we planned, the prayers we've prayed, and even the joys and heartbreaks we've endured. This was a season in my life that friends have said was just like high school. Instead it was the time in life when your friends became more like family. We were all in our 30's and single. Everyone had the desire to find love, but some found it on different paths than what they expected.

Thanks to time and a focus on the One that matters, it's a joy to catch up through a random post that makes its way to your newsfeed. You find yourself clicking over to see a photo essay of what God had all along.

May we take the words of the Hebrew writer to heart today.

"See to it that no one misses the grace of God." Hebrews 12:15

 

Brands and Blogs

Doing something for the first time -- blogging on my Blackberry. So reminds of Rev Run ending his made-for-MTV show when he would summarize the episode then type on his phone, "..God is love.  Rev Run" while soaking in his tub.  

Well, I'm not in a tub but do find myself soaking in a few things.

Earlier today I was working on my Bible Study notes and questions when I was stopped in my tracks. The apostle Paul while on his second missionary journey (traveling from Thessalonica to Berea then finally Corinth) didn't "pass the plate" to fund his ministry.  Instead he didn't want to burden to the new converts, instead he worked along side of them.  He preached in his leisure time!

What struck me was that this simple act of belonging was just part of Paul gaining respect in the first century church.  Many ministry-minded souls long for the day when they will be paid to do ministry and leave the rat race behind.

Unfotunately, there are more and more church staff including pastors leaving the ministry because of unmet expectations.  They limp away wondering if God could plant them in other places besides a pulpit.  My question is what do they do for recreation?  Is God even in the middle of that?

This year I am walking towards a dream of mine that is outlined by the Proverbs 31 wife.

Proverbs 31: 17 - 18 (New Living Translation) --  She is energetic and strong, a hard worker. She makes sure her dealings are profitable; her lamp burns late into the night.

You see, I've always longed to have a side business that would be a blessing to my family.  I've tried different things in the past but nothing took off the way I envisioned. Today I saw how far off I was.

My challenge is that in all that I do and especially in my downtime will now honor God.  No more is there His time vs. my time.  My writing, sculpting, photography, collecting -- my "brand" -- will focus back to the One who created me the way He did.  

Faith without works is dead. Likewise, work without faith is meaningless. 

Ephesians 3:19 - 21 (Contemporary English Version) -- I want you to know all about Christ's love, although it is too wonderful to be measured. Then your lives will be filled with all that God is. I pray that Christ Jesus and the church will forever bring praise to God. His power at work in us can do far more than we dare ask or imagine. Amen.

 

 

 

 

Iron Lady Fickleness

I went to see Meryl Streep's protrayal of Margaret Thatcher in the "Iron Lady" recently.  The film is a romantical glimpse of this woman's remarkable life and the swing of fickleness in public opinion. Before her run as Prime Minister, Mrs. Thatcher sits for a television interview where she gives her impressions on the United States and how it differs from the United Kingdom.  She mentions the U. S. is defined by success rather than by its history as Britian is.  This snipet and others like it outline the gist of the whole motion picture.  

It becomes a battle of hard decisions, principles, and navigating right in spite of the tide of public opinion.  Another line from the film is when the aging Mrs. Thatcher talks to her doctor about how she is not ruled by feelings, but rather she finds thoughts and ideas more stimulating.  Ideas is what will change things.  

Made me think of my weekly Bible Study discussion group and their thoughts on Acts 17.  Paul, Silas, and Timothy experienced different reactions from three very different locations: Thessalonica, Berea, and Athens.  What I find interesting that this is the chapter right before the Lord tells Paul that he is to go to the Gentiles to preach the Word because the Jews would keep enciting mob rule wherever the trio preached.

While in Athens, Paul arrived before his companions and was given a platform to share the gospel with a people who loved a good debate about anything new.  But alas, they missed the one thing that makes it all "good news" - Jesus' Resurrection.  They couldn't accept this point.  Reminded me of the expression, "if you believe in anything, you will fall for everything."  

One of the ladies in our group said that people are just "fickle." Haven't heard that word in public in a while, but I couldn't help but think that this is more than just politics - it is human nature.

We want the quick fix... the easy way out...the path of least resistance.  We have embraced the cultural norm that we've begun to accept that there are no wrong answers.  But this is NOT the truth.  

A friend of mine taught kindergarten for years, and I was surprised to hear her say to a student that life isn't fair.  Harsh concept for a young heart, but what a lesson in life it will strengthen a young mind.  Why is it that we don't discipline ourselves to take the difficult road.  Why do you base our life on successes rather than truth?  What would happen if we had courage to do what is right rather than what the mob rule wanted?

I dare say we would have a direction to walk out rather than being swayed by the distractions along the way.  

 

As the film said, "if you want to change this party, then lead it.  If you want to change the country, then lead it."  

Proverbs 28:9-11 - The Message (MSG)

 ⁹ God has no use for the prayers 
   of the people who won't listen to him. 

 ¹⁰ Lead good people down a wrong path 
   and you'll come to a bad end; 
   do good and you'll be rewarded for it. 

 ¹¹ The rich think they know it all, 
   but the poor can see right through them.

 

 

Kept

1 Peter 2:21-25 The Message (MSG)

This is the kind of life you've been invited into, the kind of life Christ lived. He suffered everything that came his way so you would know that it could be done, and also know how to do it, step-by-step. 

He never did one thing wrong, Not once said anything amiss.  They called him every name in the book and he said nothing back. He suffered in silence, content to let God set things right. He used his servant body to carry our sins to the Cross so we could be rid of sin, free to live the right way. His wounds became your healing. You were lost sheep with no idea who you were or where you were going. Now you're named and kept for good by the Shepherd of your souls.

One of my favorite memories is from our wedding.  It was the part of the vows when Pastor Kevin asked Steve, "Will you love her, comfort her, honor, and keep her..."

Keep?  That's usually not the word that women take a pasue to in their marriage vows.  The word that really captivated me, and Steve had to do it! His promise was to God, the pastor, our loved ones, and me!  

The transitive verb form of "keep" is defined as the following:

• to take notice of by appropriate conduct 
•  fulfill
•  to be faithful to <keep a promise>
•  to act fittingly in relation to <keep the Sabbath>
•  to conform to in habits or conduct 
• to stay in accord with
• preserve
• maintain
• to watch over and defend <keep us from harm>
• to take care of  - tend & support
• to maintain in a good, fitting, or orderly condition
• to continue to maintain <keep watch>
• to cause to remain in a given place, situation, or condition
• to have or maintain in an established position or relationship 
• to lodge or feed for pay
• to maintain a record in 
• to restrain from departure or removal 
• to confine oneself to 
• to stay or continue in 
• to stay or remain on 

Recently Len Schlesinger told me (and about 180,000 other people at a leadership conference) that Martin Luther King didn't just write the "I have a dream" speech in the midst of what he envisioned.  

Rather, Dr. King spent years smashing that current reality of the 1960's civil rights before he offered something new - a dream!  It's the principle that you can’t get "there" until you make it clear how unacceptable it is "here."

I look the same way as the idea of being "kept."  Until one understands what it means to be alone and basically lost, one can never know the reality of being defended, supported, maintained, watched over, preserved, and yes, kept.  

As the common benediction from Numbers 6:24 says, "May The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the LORD turn his face toward you and give you peace."  

 

 

 

 

It's an Art, I say

I'm sure most of you haven't seen this film that was released weeks ago. Probably will appear on your Netflix as a recommended suggestion three years from now.

It's more than George meets Sally kinda film. Instead it deals with the popular belief that down deep how do I make life matter. 

Rewind to when I was in photo school when my friends were convinced we would be the next Group f/64.  

So much so, that when we noticed people taking photos we would try to plant ourselves into their snapshot.  We wanted to give the lucky recipient a chance to have a momento before our notoriety made it impossible for the general public to even get close it us.

But then that was the 1980's.  Inflated egos gave everyone a false sense that we would one day be famous for their talent.

Usher in a 2011 film, and the young angst is quite different.  George wrestles with the meaningless of the world.  Even his art teacher wants him to dig around in his mind so that George can figure out who he is. Then he finds Sally.  

Now the tortured, self-defined, Teflon slacker has to find the courage to say how he feels and stop letting life pass him by.

One trick I learned from photo school is pay attention to the first three minutes of a movie.  In that window of opportunity, you will see something that will be a tie into the end of the film.  As the opening credits rolled, I noticed a black balloon deflated and caught in the branches of a tree.  This haunted me through the whole movie that there was going to be a disappointment that couldn't be escaped.

Disappointment didn't come to George, but to Sally.  Sally longs to be a muse of George yet turns to another, George's artist friend, Dustin.  In all appearances, she now has what she wants.  A man who loved her and his art.  One of the final scenes of the film crushes Sally's fantasy when she see Dustin take to his canvas.  

Do romantic ideals need to be snuffed out in order to see what is right in front us?  Why don't we want to wait to see how things will work together?  Why is it so easy to believe that God never planned for this one?  When will your heart be tired of just getting by?

Ephesians 3:20-21  The Message (MSG)

God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us...

 

 

 

Haven't in a Long Time

Is losing interest part of my modus operandi these days?  Usually it's the simple words from someone that makes me wonder about how I'm perceived.  A friend at work said that I get all excited about one thing then turns out to be not so much as time goes by.  

It's first time in a long time when I can just linger on the computer.  Haven't had the desire to do that much lately. Can't tell you, how long it's been since I've even wanted to blog about something.

That's until I found these paraphrased words of the Apostle Paul to Timothy:

1 Timothy 1:5-7 The Message (MSG)

The whole point of what we're urging is simply love—love uncontaminated by self-interest and counterfeit faith, a life open to God. Those who fail to keep to this point soon wander off into cul-de-sacs of gossip. They set themselves up as experts on religious issues, but haven't the remotest idea of what they're holding forth with such imposing eloquence.

These words startle me:  self-interest, counterfeit faith, and wander off into cul-de-sacs of gossip. I never want these words to be used to describe my heart towards God, but they do.  Just when the weight of regret hits me, I read further to learn truth about the One who redeems:

1 Timothy 1:15-16 The Message (MSG)

Here's a word you can take to heart and depend on: Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners. I'm proof—Public Sinner Number One—of someone who could never have made it apart from sheer mercy.

Despite my sinful thoughts and actions, God in His mercy still chose me, which gives me an abiding peace.  Like Paul, I could have never made it either, except that fact that I have Jesus.  

Releasing the Wrapper

Today is the first Friday I have had off in three weeks.  Steve has threatened to take away my phone so that I don't receive calls from the office.  Lately I am finding it hard to switch gears because my life  seems like a balancing act. 

To compound things, Steve and I have reversed roles.  He has become the homemaking expert, which makes me feel a bit less at home. 

My kitchen cabinet placements has been overhauled.  The furniture arrangements have shifted a bit.  Finding new picture frames sprinkled around the house.  It is all the things that have brought me joy.

Last week I acquired some furniture for the office suite we occupy.  I spent the whole day  meticulously placing things just so.  I scoured discount shops over the weekend to purchase the little extras to make things perfect.  As I used the "wind tunnel" fabric attachment on the vacuum, couldn't help but hum a Nickelback song. 

Wasn't aware until Statia found it funny that I was acting like June Cleaver!

Instead of trying to figure out why God has had things go this way, I should been thankful that He has carved out moments that bring me such joy in my day-to-day.  I need to be energized, challenged, and organized.  "Releasing the wrapper" that it comes in should be something I do willing.  But that's what hangs me up the most. 

God, why didn't You do it this way?  I've been thinking about it a lot, and it seems to me that this would be the most efficient way to make me happy.  If God was a texter, He would respond back to me with "LOL."

Ephesians 1:  11 (The Message)

It's in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose he is working out in everything and everyone.

Doing Satan's Job For Him

This is the phrase that jumped off the 104th page of "A Purpose Driven Life."  Here is the whole quote:

Whenever I judge another believer, four things instantly happen:  I lose fellowship with God, I expose my own pride and insecurity, I set myself up to be judged by God, and I harm the fellowship of the church.  A critical spirit is a costly vice.

The Bible calls Satan "the accuser of our brothers."  It's the Devil's job to blame, complain, and criticize members of God's family.  Anytime we do the same, we're being duped into doing Satan's work for him.  Remember, other Christians, no matter how much you disagree with them, are not the real enemy.

Thanks to years with my life coach, I've learned that my healthy default system is living in accountability.  Which means I thrive when I admit my shortcomings and see what I could have done better in the situation.  I struggle when others throw off any ownership to the problem then throw hand grenades into the mix.

According to Wikipedia, a hand grenade is an anti-personal weapon that explodes a short time after release.

Whenever a person can't be confronted on the issues of a disagreement, they lob in their own anti-personal weapon to distract, which always causes more damage than before the conflict began.  That can be the past argument, not letting something go, or a personal character trait attack.   

My goal is not to do the work of Satan, but emulate my Savior.  So, here is my "intentional statement:"  I am willing to build up the body of believers today.

I Thessalonians 5:9
God didn't set us up for an angry rejection but for salvation by our Master, Jesus Christ. He died for us, a death that triggered life. Whether we're awake with the living or asleep with the dead, we're alive with him! So speak encouraging words to one another. Build up hope so you'll all be together in this, no one left out, no one left behind. I know you're already doing this; just keep on doing it.

How to Share Life

The Purpose Driven Life (Day 18) states that in order to share life we should model the Scripture references that include the phrase, "one another," because that is what true biblical fellowship is. 

Here is what I found in the New International Version of the Bible.

Romans 12:9-11 - Be devoted to one another in love...Honor one another above yourselves

John 13:34 - Love one another…you must love one another

2 Corinthians 13:11 - Strive for full restoration, encourage one another

2 Corinthians 13:12 - Greet one another with a holy kiss

I Peter 4:9 - Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling

I John 4:12 - If we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us

John 13: 35 - Everyone will know that you are my disciples if you love one another

Job 41:17 - Joined fast to one another; they cling together and cannot be parted

Hebrews 13:1 - Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters

Ephesians 4:2 - Be patient, bearing with one another in love

Ephesians 5:21 - Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ

Philippians 2:5 - In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus

Ephesians 4:32 - Be kind and compassionate to one another

Romans 15:7 - Accept one another…in order to bring praise to God

Hebrews 10:24 - Spur one another on toward love and good deeds

Zechariah 7:9 - Administer true justice; show mercy and compassion to one another.

Hebrews 3:13 - Encourage one another daily

James 5:9 - Don’t grumble against one another

I Peter 3:8 - Be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble

Romans 15:14 - Filled with knowledge and competent to instruct one another

Galatians 5:13 - Serve one another humbly in love

Ephesians 5:19 - Speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit

I John 1:7 - Fellowship with one another

Leviticus 19:11 - Do not deceive one another

Romans 12:16 - Live in harmony with one another

I Peter 5:5 - Clothe yourselves with humility toward one another

Colossians 3:16 - Admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit

2 Thessalonians 1:3 - The love all of you have for one another is increasing

Romans 13:8 - Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law

James 4:11 - Do not slander one another

Esther 9:22 - Observe the days as days of feasting and joy and giving presents of food to one another and gifts to the poor

These guidelines seem so simplistic in nature, but truly difficult to honor them in a daily journey along side of any one.  When working through a relationship struggle, I need to go back to these Scriptures and follow them no matter what my feelings may be.  Because after all, Romans 13:8 puts it best:

Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another...